Bound in the Streets

I let Cris into my life and look what happened: I got attached. Now I have feelings, and feelings are the worst. The truth is that I more than like him. I other-L-word him, which doesn't solve anything; it makes everything worse. I've loved people in the past and it got me heartbroken, betrayed, and abandoned so no thank you. My job that I'm usually so competent at is killing me, Cris wants more, and I can't handle it all. I can give Cris grand gestures and dirty weekends, but despite...
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I let Cris into my life and look what happened: I got attached. Now I have feelings, and feelings are the worst. The truth is that I more than like him. I other-L-word him, which doesn't solve anything; it makes everything worse. I've loved people in the past and it got me heartbroken, betrayed, and abandoned so no thank you. My job that I'm usually so competent at is killing me, Cris wants more, and I can't handle it all. I can give Cris grand gestures and dirty weekends, but despite everything he's given me I still can't hand over my heart. Which sucks, because I don't think he's willing to accept any substitutes. Now what the hell am I supposed to do?